I am a stuffer...pure and simple. I am the type of person who will let things build and build and build until I reach my breaking point. An example of this is at my current job. Some people wrote some negative comments on the staff review section of my six month eval. Since they remained anonymous I think they turned off their filtering system and turned on the passive aggressiveness. I stuffed my hurt and anger down for six months until we had a meeting at work where we were supposed to "put all of our issues with each other on the table" then the whole story came flying out. It felt good it was out but I hated the fact that I stuffed it down so far and let it fester for so long.
This week was another example of this. Last week a co-worker (who complained about EVERYTHING) left for a "better" job. He also left us with files in disarray and ones that had nonworking phone numbers. This left extra stress and work for me and my co-workers. This commenced my infamous "Stuffing".....by Wednesday of this week I was at my breaking point---I wouldn't talk to my husband about it, I burst into tears numerous times and everything else that was added to the pile felt so much worse (My stuffing pile that is.) I knew I had to get away on Wednesday so I ended up at Barnes and Noble for awhile. I am terrible at going away to sort things out. Our old place did not have a lot of places I could go without having to hop in the car and trek a ways....my husband also had a rocky year last year and I became afraid of getting out and doing things for myself in case something happened with him when I was gone. (Which he finally had to sit me down and tell me I needed to stop that.)
One of my new things needs to be rediscovering those places I can get away to. I used to love to have those "Thinking spots." I used to love to take my scrapbooking supplies and head out to Archiver's and work on my pages. I used to love to take walks at the Nature Center or around the lake. I just stopped doing that in 08 and need to start again. I think Barnes and Noble is a good starting point because it's close and because I can sit and read without a commitment to buy anything.
By the way, I will be starting a new 365 day challenge on July 26th. I will post about it on this site but will continue to let you know about my new things as I do them.
-Jackie
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9 comments:
I am so sorry you have had a tough week. I hope you are able to find some new spots to get away from things. I can totally relate to the difficulty of adjusting to a new place, but hopefully in time we will both adjust. Praying for you ((HUGS))
Thanks--it has had more to do with my job and my apartment manager holding onto our security deposit more than anything. But I hear you--we both need time to adjust. I am trying to take off the first week in September so I can do so.
Glad to hear that you have an outlet. Sometimes, it's good to just get away, even if it's just for a little while...
I was wondering how everything turned out with your security deposit. Is it still up in the air? I hope and pray it is resolved soon.
The security deposit issue is still up in the air. They were supposed to call me last week and they never did. They have until the 15th to respond to the complaint from the Better Business Bureau. I called the apartment office there out of curiosity and and there was another lady who answered the phone. I am wondering if this apartment manager is FINALLY under investiagtion...
B&N is one of my go to places. My 'hometown' is another. That's where I went after work yesterday. It reminds me to 'breathe'. Hope it all gets better.
Praying for you and yours!!!
What is your goal for this 365 challange?
My new year long challenge.......................................................................................................................................................................will be revealed in 5 more days!
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